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In the adventurous world of intimate self-discovery and pleasure, few aids have garnered as much attention as adult toys and personal lubricants. From the bedroom of a curious novice to the nightstand drawer of an experienced aficionado, these products have gradually shed their tabooed reputation to become essential tools in the pursuit of sexual wellness.
Determined to uplift your sexual comfort and confidence, we aim to bridge this gap knowledge with our comprehensive FAQ guide. Stripping off the complex layers, we'll dive into the essentials to smoothly navigate the waters of choosing and using adult toys and personal lubricants.
Join us as we answer some of the most frequently asked questions about these handy companions, hopefully empowering you with the information you need to make informed decisions aligned with your desires and needs. Welcome to your educational journey towards a more enjoyable, satisfying, and confident intimate life.
1. How do I talk about using sex toys with a guy?
For some reason, we believe sex toys are for solo play. Even though there are enough innovative couple’s sex toys in the market to prove otherwise.
This mindset also leads men to think introducing sex toys into the bedroom means he isn’t pleasing you enough or you want to replace him with the toy.
So, a little tact might go a long way. One thing you can do is send him YouTube links, blogs, and podcasts, talking about sex toys. Don’t say you want to use one directly yet. Just let him know you find this stuff interesting.
Next, you can start sending him links to sex toys you think he would enjoy. For example, instead of toys thought to be made for solo play, send him a link to handcuffs.
There’s a good chance he would bring up the topic himself. But if he doesn’t, sit him down in a common space, like the living room. Don’t do it in the bedroom and definitely not after sex.
Start the conversation by prefacing how you enjoy what you do together. But you think both of you could have more fun with sex toys. Make it sound like a new challenge to tackle and one you want to tackle together.
Chances are, after going through the links you have already sent him, he is way more willing than he knows.
2. What is the safest lubricant to use?
Water-based lubricants are the safest. They do not cause allergic reactions as they have a smaller number of ingredients. The fewer chemicals you come in contact with, the fewer allergies you have the chance of discovering.
Water-based lube doesn’t have chemicals in common with condoms or sex toys either. So, it doesn’t damage those toys.
The consistency of water lube is similar to the lubricants our body produces, so they do not feel overly sticky or too dry as well.
3. What vaginal lube is best for sex play?
Water-based lube is best for any kind of sex act. Unless the sex act has something to do with water or you are planning to use it in the shower.
Then, you want to use silicone lube.
But if you plan on using the lube with a condom, never go for oil-based lube. The oil composition will likely damage the latex. Don’t use a rubber toy with oil-based lube either.
4. What are your top 5 sex toys you recommend to someone?
Sex toys are never one-size-fits-all. A good way to find your top 5 is to try as many as you can.
Here are 5 types of sex toys we think any beginner will have fun with:
- A bullet vibrator like the BMS Factory Essential Vibe
- A vibrating dildo
- A butt plug trainer set
- Blindfolds for those wanting to experiment with BDSM
- A cock ring.
5. Is it okay to regularly use my sex toys?
Yes, it is okay to regularly use your sex toys. As long as you clean them up before and after use and store them properly. If you are maintaining hygiene and safety rules, there is no reason you can’t use your sex toys every day.
Now, there are myths about how using sex toys can numb your body parts and make actual sex unenjoyable. But that’s what they are, myths. If you do feel numb in certain places, it won’t be for long.
A 2009 study did find 16% of the people who used vibrators experienced numbness for a short period. But it only lasted for more than a day for 0.05%.
Gigi Engle, the author of All the F*cking Mistakes: A Guide to Sex, Love, and Life explains the situation as similar to feeling numb on your legs after sitting on your foot for a while. The blood flow stops for a while, but it never has a lasting effect.
6. What's the difference between silicone and glass sex toys?
Silicone and glass sex toys are similar in a lot of ways. They are both easy-to-clean, nonporous substances.
But silicone toys tend to range from extra soft to extra firm. Usually, a silicone toy is used to imitate certain body parts during sex. If someone wants a more realistic experience with sex toys, they go for silicone. Silicone is also cheaper than glass sex toys, though more expensive than ABS plastic.
Meanwhile, glass sex toys are always hard, smooth substances. They are made of borosilicate glass. It’s essentially the same type of glass you will find in your kitchen.
The glass sex toys are cool to the touch and you can warm them up as much as you need for temperature play. They are also visually appealing, like the Pipedream Products Icicles No. 79 Glass Massager.
Only, glass sex toys can get super expensive. They are also prone to breaking or getting cracks. If your glass toy has any sort of fissure, throw it out immediately. You don’t want the glass shards to cut into your skin.
7. Can I use silicone lube on a 100% silicone dildo?
No, you should never use silicone lube with a silicone sex toy.
When both of these materials come together, it can cause a chemical reaction. The silicone lube can burn or permanently damage your toy.
8. How to choose a safe and body-friendly lubricant for a sex toy?
If you want a safe and body-friendly lubricant, your best bet is water-based lube. It works with condoms and any kind of sex toy. The second safest option might be a hybrid lube.
If you want to use silicone or oil-based lube but you are concerned about safety, do a patch test first. Also, make sure to never mix chemicals.
So, silicone toys should never be used with silicone lube and oil-based toys never with rubber toys or condoms.
9. What lubricant is the best for male sex toys?
When it comes to lubes, how the male and female anatomy respond isn’t much different.
Water-based lubes are still the safest option even with male sex toys because of their allergy-free nature.
But, if you are going to be using something like a butt plug, you want to go for a thicker lube like silicone or oil. Water lube dries up first, while silicone and oil don’t.
But this only works if you are careful enough to not use oil lube with a rubber butt plug or silicone lube with a silicone butt plug.
